I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Just high enough for therapy.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
