I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?