I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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