i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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