No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize