I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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