Just fell off a train. Bad.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
