i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
