he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize