i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I take back everything I said about communal showers
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
