I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
