I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I think people are normalizing furries
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
