Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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