Whats the glycemic index on semen?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Use "feeling words"
Yay
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
