Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize