he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
