OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
how drunk are you?
Several
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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