I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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