you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
