so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
