so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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