i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
