a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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