The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
