so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Randomize
