guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
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