Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
