Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
