Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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