we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
