would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
