Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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