Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Oh god it's open bar.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize