Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
