Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
