Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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