i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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