I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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