Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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