ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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