I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
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