I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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