what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
