the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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