An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
