i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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