So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize