omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I need water and some morals
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Randomize
