Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
