Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
She bit a glass in half.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
The uberlube is also flammable
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
