Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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