Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
