I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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